Consent

The big day arrived.  I was so excited.  I had prepared for this for so long.  Tonio was excited too.  He has wondered about so many things and has counted down the days.  The only way this day could have a different outcome was if his biological mother did not show up to give CONSENT.  She had given it verbally and legally a handful of times so far.  She had been consistent so there was nothing to worry about, said our social worker.

However, I knew that so much was riding on her consent and that getting her there would not be that easy, not because she didn't want to but because of transportation, etc.  The Love and Hope team arranged to pick her up at a bus stop and take her to the courthouse for our 8:45am hearing.  I drove separately and as I walked to the courthouse I was talking out loud to myself, training my mind to think about all that God has done and will do to complete this work and to not focus on all the things that could go wrong.  I was nervous but I had to channel it.  After 8:45 rolled around, I got word that his mother was going to be late.  They interviewed Tonio first and then the judge said she could move on with her other cases and maybe make room for her later.  Whew.  Ok.  Well, she never showed at the bus stop.  She didn't answer her phone for a long time either.  We found out she had forgotten her phone, went back to get it and then decided to stop at the bank to pay some bills.  Really?!!??  So, the team went out to get her at the bank but couldn't find her anywhere.  I sat at the courthouse sick to my stomach.  Was she dodging this?  Was she saying one thing and intentionally not doing it?  What was going on?  What will happen if she doesn't come today?  What will happen if she doesn't sign ever?  Does she really understand what's at stake here?  I couldn't go there in my head but I couldn't help it either.  I had brought my journal so that I could write truth statements and keep my mind on track.  It was so hard though, every minute seemed like an hour and every hour seemed like an eternity.  I started to doubt that this would happen today and I was so fearful.  I sang hymns in my head and kept whispering "Jesus".  Tonio even heard me and repeated it a few times.  The Love and Hope team kept calling her, kept looking for her and waiting.  At about 10:30am(2.5 hours after the arranged meeting time) we got word that they found her, she was in the vehicle and on the way.  Ahhh....relief.  After 3 hours - at 11am she walked through the courthouse doors and we all breathed a little easier.   She explained it was a complicated morning trying to get there but I didn't care really to hear her reasons, I was concerned if she was still going to sign.  My lawyer went on to inform the court she was there and the judge said that she needed a lawyer too so another scramble of trying to make things happen took place.  Finally the judge appointed her one that was already there and they were able to squeeze us in around noon.  The whole process probably lasted less than 10 minutes because they were trying to fit us in.  Consent took less than 30 seconds and then she was asked to leave.  The judge, very serious yet kind, said "he is now your son" and "we normally wouldn't have scheduled this at this time or made this exception but because you were in the country and we know that you are leaving in August we will not delay, what normally takes days to produce the final written decree - you will have tomorrow"

While waiting to sign the papers, I stood in awe of what God had just done.

• we missed our hearing time because the mother didn't show up on time
• the judge made an exception to hear the case when she arrived
• the judge made an exception to appoint her an attorney
• the judge made an exception to hear a case in 10 minutes 
• the judge made an exception to get the papers signed in 20 minutes in the hallway
• the judge made an exception to produce the decree for the following day

He was in control and completed His work seemingly against all odds.   He has big plans for Tonio and I'm just along for the ride.  After his biological mother signed her consent, I told her "What you did today was the best thing you could have done for your son.  God loves him so much that He put it on my heart to take care of him.  He loves you that much too.  I will always remember your story.  I will not forget the troubles you have faced and how courageous you were today.  I care for you and your family very much.  I respect you for what you have done.  You have allowed an incredible blessing to happen for your son's life".

When I think about just how much was riding on this woman's parental consent, and how in so many ways this hearing could have been thwarted, I think "If our God is for us, then who could ever stop us?"  And He had given His divine CONSENT along time ago...

My faith has been stretched through every step of this process.  So many times I said, "I can't take much more" "I feel like I will die if this doesn't go through" "My heart just yearns and I feel out of control".  In those places I do not like to be but it is the only place where He can be seen for real and can carry me beyond what I can bear.  

When his mother told me that their grandma is failing, his older sister can't leave the house because she's in a wheel chair and no one can carry her down the steps to get out of the house, and the oldest son doesn't want to study anymore because at 16 years old he joined the gang - I really felt the weight of how God has saved Tonio and given him new life.  

Telling Tonio

The amazement of what just happened last week is still settling in my mind and heart.  All of my prayers seemed to be answered in one split second.  I had prayed for at least a meeting with the judge in order to plead for a court date.  Done.  I prayed that the judge would approve this adoption so that it could go to a hearing.  Done.  I prayed for the adoption to be completed this summer.  Done.  And last Monday I cried out to God that I wouldn't have to say goodbye to him one more time.  Done. Wow.  I am so grateful for God's favor.  I am in awe of how He worked out every last little detail to my benefit, especially when it looked impossible, but most importantly, he stretched my faith in a deeper way.  I look back and think "I could've had more.  I should've never doubted or been frustrated.  I will be even better next time".

TELLING TONIO
Tonio grinned from ear to ear as he sat and listened to me tell him what is to come.  "Since I met you I had a desire to love and care for you.  When I moved back to the States I worked hard to make you my son and bring you home with me.  I was so sad to say goodbye to you every time I visited.  But this time, this time it's for real, this time you get to come home with me and live with me as my son, in my home, in the United States".   He beamed, not knowing what to say, quietly processing, but beaming.  When asked his thoughts about it, he nodded his head and said "yes", he wanted this.

Tonio has never been shy about his desire to live with me and go to the United States with me.  The hardest thing for me during this entire process was keep that from him until I received a concrete date of when it would happen.  His dream and desire came true at last.  Immediately Tonio took on possession of my family calling them "my grandparents, my nieces and nephews, my house, and our cat".  (I had to explain that my nieces and nephews are his cousins, he still doesn't get it, but there's plenty of time for that!)   Every morning the first words out of his mouth are "I'm going to the United States!  Woo hoo!".  He's asked some really cute questions such as, "What uniform should I take to go to school there?" (all Latin American schools were uniforms so it will be a change for him to wear regular clothes to school).  After singing the lyrics to "Happy", he suddenly wanted to know what music they have in the states.  I laughed and said "exactly what you're singing".  Tonio has had a fascination for planes ever since he realized that's how one travels to the United States.  He is soooo excited about the opportunity to ride in one.  He asked how many "minutes" will he be in it and if we can sleep once we get going.  This plane ride is going to be precious.  It will be in those hours that he will move forward to the unknown but his childlike faith and ability to transition well to anything with a positive, joyful attitude will be something he will teach all of us.

I have seen so much growth in this little man - from his academic achievements (reading, writing, English, etc.) to growing stronger physically and especially the way he is so teachable and desires to learn, work hard and enjoy life.  This kid is ready for what is to come.  I have no doubt that he will thrive in his new surroundings and that he will melt every single heart that meets him.

I speak as if it has already been completed.  The truth is that him and I still have to be observed by a social worker and psychologist from the court on July 10th for 30 minutes.  And there still is a hearing.  His biological mother still has to show up to give her parental consent one last time.  I agree with my uncle Jon who commented that he would continue to pray until we are on American soil.  I ask that you all would do that as well - pray against any obstacles that could prevent these last few protocols.  I know that God will complete this very good work that He inspired in me.  I praise Him for what he has done, is doing and will do on July 14th.

Tonio's homework assignment for Mother's Day was to describe his mother.  He described me.  He didn't know it then that it would happen for real!