Precious Moments

There have been many sweet moments when I feel my heart melt at the chance to connect with a child.  One night I was reading a bedtime story to Daniel, 5 years old, and after we both layed down to sleep I heard him whispering to himself over and over, ¨Jehovah, es mi pastor, nada me faltara¨ (The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want...)  It was so sweet and innocent as he talked himself to sleep that I just melted.  I am so glad he is learning so young to think on these things.

Another morning I went into the cafeteria where the kids have devotions in the morning before school.  Raquel was the only one there so I asked her if I could read some devotional stories to her and she said yes.  After we read them I asked her if there was anything she wanted to pray about and she mentioned her concern over her brother´s behavior lately and whether her family would come to visit her.  We prayed together and I could tell that she was feeling rather sad and serious about those burdens.  I was thankful for the chance to spend alone time with her.  She is not usually open about her feelings like she was so I counted it a sweet opportunity to connect with her.

Most of my day is spent doing administrative work but there is never a loss for special moments with a child.  I melt at their smiles, when they give me a kiss on the cheek and when they don´t want me to leave their side after a bedtime story.  It´s almost like eating chocolate but the taste lasts longer!

Out of My Control

Within a few days, a lot happened all at once.  Some good, most bad.  I've been challenged like I knew I would be...my privacy, my things, my peace and quiet, my sleep, my eating habits, my time.  I think about how I have to let some things go in order to live in a big community with children but also protect that which is near and dear to me. 

For starters, there are rats in my room.  I freaked out but someone came to the rescue and killed the first one with the whip of a towel!  When I found the next one in my bedsheet we bought traps and I slept somewhere else.  Then, my computer broke.  The only way to get internet access in Nejapa without a telephone landline is to buy a broadband USB device.  I had mine for one week and it is gone.  Yep, gone.  Unfortunately, I witnessed someone getting into my purse in my room and decided I had to make some changes.  I thought about all of things I wanted to protect and secure and how all of that had been compromised some way.  The truth is...there are many things I can't control.  They all happen for a reason.  I've been challenged to see how I can get over these disappointments when my most favorite comforts are taken away.  Really challenged.

Now we have created a "missionary room" which is one a different level from the kid's rooms.  There's more privacy and security for our things there.  We painted it and made it our own.  Although I'm sad to move out of the "house family", I'm not sad to see the rats go.  Part of my experience here so far has been that I have to protect myself and that means my time.  I came primarily to be an administator for the home.  Quickly I noticed that it's hard to do that and be a house parent.  With the kids having 24 hour childcare, my role is to participate during meals, morning devotions, bedtime stories and stay in the "house" on the weekends.  I adjusted it to make it function better for me and for them.

I love the job that I am doing.  By far the best part is working with Rachel (director).  We get along well, work well together and have been able to share with each other in many ways.  I really love and respect her for who she is and who God has called her to be.  My day to day has been keeping her on task, reminding her of her priorities, scheduling the home's events (dr. appt's, meetings, special visits, lessons, etc.), working with the lawyer to do staff contracts and start a new Salvadoran non-governmental organization, interviewing and hiring a bus driver and meeting with other professionals who fit the profile of a Board member for the NGO piece and organizing team visits and missionary schedules.  This role fits me well I think.  I like to organize and I especially like working with the Salvadoran people.  It's a honor to serve them in such a way.  I really respect their hard work and love developing relationships with them in Spanish. 

It seems weird that it's late July.  The weather is nice here, hot but comfortable as of late, it's rainy season so the evenings are wet but cool, perfect sleeping weather.  I eat lots of icecream!  I have been able to have beautiful journaling mornings with coffee after I do a workout DVD (Jillian Michaels rocks!), then I start my work day.  One thing I will have to learn is to drive... yikes!  I will need to run errands and do business meetings for Rachel so me driving will help be more productive.  Maybe next month!  Ha!

I feel like I've been learning so much from God's word and from the people around me.  I was reminded today that this life is meant not for selfishness but for serving others.  It's easy to take on the attitude of guarding things I want for myself like my time or things but I am reminded that everytime I stop doing for myself and read a book to a kid, play a game with a group, ask a "tia" how their day is and have coffee with her or wash the dishes for the cook when she's not looking, it makes a difference in their life.  There's never a dull moment here to make a difference in lives.  I love that the most.... because they make a difference in mine too.

1 YEAR and 100 lbs!!!

Well I made it here safe and sound.  The hardest part was getting one year of my life into two suitcases with a 100 lb. limit!  Once I checked those bags through to San Salvador, the load literally lifted from my shoulders and mind.  I am working on making my room a home and figuring out just what my days are going to look like.  One thing I can say is that I love it here and I love what I am going to be doing.  The kids and Salvadoran staff remembered me from last year so it was refreshing to build on those relationships.

The first few days was interesting because a 1.5 year old boy with cerebral palsy was dropped off at the home by his mother because she was struggling taking care of him.  The home is at capacity and cannot take on more kids but the mother said she was going to just leave him home alone if noone would take him, so we took him for 3 days.  Fortunately, 3 Americans showed up the next day and we took turns taking care of him.  I took the night shift.  He needed to be held at all times and he did not sleep.  It was my first sacrifice of a night´s loss of sleep with a little baby but just within that one night he melted my heart.  It seems cruel or unloving to think that a mother would just drop off her kid and not want him anymore, but, it almost seems impossible for a Salvadoran mother to take care of a special needs child at the same time.  Most mothers are left without their husbands help and so they have to work and provide childcare as well.  It seems like an impossible battle too.  We were able to connect with her after the 3 days and offer her some resources so that her son could get the care he needs.  This is an everyday struggle here in El Salvador.

Yesterday I was reading through the psalm 144 and I came across this verse... 
"Deliver me and rescue me
       from the hands of foreigners
       whose mouths are full of lies,
       whose right hands are deceitful.
¹² Then our sons in their youth
       will be like well-nurtured plants,
       and our daughters will be like pillars
       carved to adorn a palace.
 ¹³ Our barns will be filled
       with every kind of provision.
       Our sheep will increase by thousands,
       by tens of thousands in our fields;
 ¹⁴ our oxen will draw heavy loads. ^[b]
       There will be no breaching of walls,
       no going into captivity,
       no cry of distress in our streets.
 ¹⁵ Blessed are the people of whom this is true;
       blessed are the people whose God is the LORD.

Please pray for the kids at Love and Hope and that they would be well-nurtured plants and pillars carved to adorn a palace.  Also, pray for the streets of El Salvador and that there would be no cry of distress from the people and for those who are held captive by drugs, alcoholism, gangs, etc. that they would be set free. 

I am enjoying this new position of administration.  I work with Rachel daily on fitting in the most important tasks for the day.  I also get to learn so much from her as we drive around the city running errands.  There is so much to do and I'm quickly learning that it just doesn't get done quickly in El Salvador compared to the US.  So we are diligent about making the most of the time we do have, yet protecting the time set aside for a healthy balance.  Tomorrow is our one and only day off during the week and we are looking forward to spending some time either hiking or walking in a park and going out to dinner.  Well, time to go... adios!