“This is when it gets good” was the response Rachel gave me when I sat her down and told her that there was only $890 left in donations back home for the next month. I thought she’d break down, cry, get worried and wonder how we are going to eat and pay our staff on November 15th. Instead she thanked me for being here and called me a true missionary. “This is when it gets good” is what she left me with so I’m challenged to sit back and watch what happens and how God will work out His will for His children and His home.
Throughout this past year, there have been more challenges that anyone can think humanly possible to this ministry. In February a new non-profit organization was organized to help channel funds from the States to El Salvador. The group of church members gave much input as to how to improve the operations at the home. Many volunteers here worked hard to get these pieces in place. I know that I forced myself to learn more about water systems, retirement pensions, auto mechanics and insurance policies than I ever wanted to. I also learned that no matter how hard you try to please someone and communicate truth, it sometimes falls on deaf ears and simply can’t be done. This is a hard pill for me to swallow because I always want the truth to be told, for people to agree and for hard work to be valued. In the end, no matter how hard we tried, it just wasn’t enough. And with the dissolution of the NPO, so comes the challenges of funds.
My reaction to all of this is to fight. I don’t know where to begin. Do I go for a walk and cry out to God for mercy? Do I call everyone I know back home and ask them to send money? Do I reach out to grocery stores here in town and ask for beans and rice in quantity? “This is when it gets good” requires me to put down the boxing gloves and become a spectator. It goes totally against my nature but it will be good for my faith. My pastor told me that you will never see God’s hand when there are funds in the bank – you may think you will – but it’s not the same. So I’m going to watch and see how this gets good. I look forward to the stories I get to share with you. I’m thankful for this faith test, how it challenges me to believe beyond my finite thoughts and trust words promised to us from a God who still exists to love us and provide for us. Stay tuned….
